The Radical Rebellion of Not Being a Jerk
"Even if the whole universe is nothing but a bunch of jerks doing all kinds of jerk-type things, there is still liberation in simply not being a jerk."
— Zen Master Dogen (translated by Brad Warner)
It seems like there are more jerks than ever these days.
From the top down, cruelty, corruption, and general jerkitude have become the default operating system of the world.
And yet, you see the damage this causes.
Anger only fuels more anger.
Some people tear everything down but never build anything better.
A world run by jerks becomes more miserable for everyone.
It’s easy to feel disheartened. It’s easy to let despair take root.
And yet, one of the simplest, most powerful acts of rebellion you have is to resist your worst impulses.
In a world full of jerks, simply not being a jerk is its own revolution.
The True Meaning of “Not Being a Jerk”
It’s easy to confuse kindness with passivity.
It’s easy to get lost in platitudes and Pollyanna-style thinking. Some people believe that being "nice" means looking the other way, keeping quiet, or avoiding conflict.
But that’s not what this is about.
What Dogen is really making the case for is Ethics — a concise, intentional way of navigating the world, both in how you treat others and in how you manage your own internal state.
Because your actions and your inner world are not separate.
The way you act is always a reflection of your inner state.
The way you act also shapes your inner state.
When people act in cruel or selfish ways, their minds are already filled with anger, fear, and delusion.
But what we often forget is that the opposite is also true.
When you choose integrity over impulse, generosity over selfishness, and wisdom over reactivity, you shape your mind in the process.
This is the foundation of a virtuous cycle.
It transforms you from the inside and ripples outward into the world.
Start Small, But Think Big
This practice can begin with the most mundane of things:
Letting someone merge into your lane in the middle of a traffic jam.
Returning the shopping cart to the rack instead of leaving it in the parking lot.
Resisting the urge to gossip with your coworkers about “that one” person in the office.
On their own, these might seem like trivial behaviors. But when done consistently and with intention, these small acts begin to reprogram the way you think and the way you move through the world.
Each time you choose the path of the “non-jerk,” you’re turning your attention away from your own ego. This simple redirection starts to soften the mind. It creates a spaciousness where the usual stresses and anxieties lose their grip.
With every small, intentional act, you are quietly laying the foundation for something much larger.
Over time, this practice builds the resilience and clarity you’ll need to face the bigger challenges in life when integrity and strength matter most.
When the World Feels Hopeless, You Become the Beacon
There are moments when everything seems like it’s spiraling into jerk-fueled chaos.
And I want to be completely clear about something:
Much of what’s happening in the world right now goes far beyond just “jerk behavior.”
Some of it is dangerous, and some of it causes real suffering.
Knowing this, there is a place for righteous anger. And there is a place for decisive action.
But there’s a difference between taking action and getting consumed.
Are you channeling your appropriate outrage into something meaningful?
Or are you just feeding your own fire? Are you getting lost in cycles of despair, doomscrolling, or empty venting?
This is where mindfulness becomes the key.
In every moment, you have a choice:
Do you react with more anger and add to the fire?
Do you turn away and let things continue unchecked?
Or do you show up with strength and ethics, without being consumed by the negativity around you?
And this isn’t just about “doing good” for others.
It’s about creating an inner foundation of steadiness and clarity so that you can engage fully without losing yourself.
When you train yourself through mindfulness, self-reflection, and intentional action, you build the ability to stand firm in the world without being swept away by it.
When There Is Nothing You Can Do
You don’t have to fight every battle.
Some problems are too vast to fix alone. When that’s the case, turn your attention to what you can control. Take care of your body. Steady your mind. Support the people around you.
Remember, your inner jerk is at its strongest when exhaustion or anger is all you have left.
Taking care of yourself is not retreating. It is how you keep yourself ready for the bigger journey.
Even the smallest acts help lay the foundation for transforming both your inner world and the world around you.
Start Today
The path of the non-jerk isn’t easy.
Human beings evolved to react. To protect themselves. To serve their own interests.
But you also have the ability to choose.
Every moment of intention is an opportunity to train yourself in a better way.
No matter what’s happening in the world, no matter how many jerks are running the show, you always have control over your own actions.
And the more you act with integrity, the better the world becomes—not just for others, but for you as well.
It’s not an easy path.
But it’s the right one.
I invite you to walk it with me.
~ Rob
P.S. – If you ever need support, whether it’s someone to talk to or guidance on practice, please don’t hesitate to reach out.
I’m always happy to chat via email or a free call.
And if you’re looking for deep, customized support in building a practice that fits your life, I currently have space for just one more private student. If that’s you, let’s talk.
Contact Me Here
Yin Yoga for Inner Stillness: Find Calm in Chaos | A Deeply Grounding Practice
When life feels overwhelming, pause and find your center with this practice: Yin Yoga for Inner Stillness: Find Calm in Chaos. Through long, mindful holds, you’ll release stress, quiet your mind, and restore balance.
This session is designed to settle your nervous system, ease tension, and bring you back to center—no matter what’s happening around you.
What You’ll Experience in This Class:
~ Deeply restorative Yin Yoga poses for inner stillness
~ Mindfulness to quiet a busy mind
~ A calming sequence to reduce stress and anxiety
~ A chance to slow down, reset, and feel truly present
Who This Class is For:
If you’re feeling anxious, overstimulated, or in need of clarity, this class will help you find calm and stability. Whether you’re navigating stress or simply seeking stillness, these poses will ground you.
How Giving Up Strength Training Made Me Even Stronger
For the past two years, my mornings have focused on strength.
First, it was calisthenics, a more focused bodyweight practice than yoga asana could give me.
I worked through progressions, perfected my form, and got stronger than ever. But I was also constantly sore and tired.
I didn’t realize it yet, but this pointed to a bigger problem.
So I shifted to kettlebells.
A simple routine of heavy swings and Turkish get-ups. And for a while, it felt great.
Then something started to change.
I wasn’t recovering as well. My sleep got lighter. Instead of feeling energized, I felt wired.
And when I sat down for meditation, my nervous system was running on overdrive. I wasn’t able to drop in.
At first, I tried to push through, waiting for my body to adapt. But that moment never really came.
Because the problem wasn’t adaptation. It was a lack of deeper balance.
Strength Wasn’t the Problem. Imbalance Was.
Since I teach yoga full-time, I already get plenty of movement.
My days are filled with asana. So I leaned on strength training as my counterbalance.
But I had missed the big picture.
My strength training was pushing me too far into Yang energy. Because of this imbalance, I wasn’t able to recover or find my natural equilibrium.
And it wasn’t just the training that was depleting me.
I had also been creating constantly.
Between teaching, writing, and building my business, I was in constant output mode.
This, too, was Yang energy. Driven, focused, expansive.
My entire lifestyle tilted toward Yang, and my body needed the opposite.
Yin and Yang: The Art of Listening
In Taoist philosophy, Yin and Yang aren’t just abstract ideas. They describe how energy moves through everything—your body, your mind, your practice.
Yang is active. It fuels strength, movement, creativity, and expansion.
Yin is receptive. It fosters softness, stillness, restoration, and integration.
And here’s the thing. Most people are stuck in constant Yang mode without realizing it.
If your life is full of stress, intensity, and deadlines, throwing yourself into high-output workouts might not be the right answer.
If you feel sluggish, scattered, or unmotivated, deep restoration alone might not be enough.
The key isn’t doing more or less. It’s doing what’s needed.
And most people aren’t listening.
My Body Needed a Different Kind of Practice
So I made a change.
Instead of reaching for a kettlebell, I returned to my Qigong practice for my morning movement.
It’s not yoga or weights, but it’s still a powerful way to start my day. It allows me to work with subtle energy in a way that feels natural. I can move my whole body without wearing myself out, and it seamlessly integrates the principles of Yin and Yang.
I felt the difference within days.
I was less wired, more steady. My nervous system began to rebalance, and everything started to feel right again.
This doesn’t mean I’ve quit strength training forever. Strength training is awesome. And necessary.
But balance sometimes means accepting seasonality.
There’s a time for building and a time for restoration. Right now, my body needs the latter.
And that’s the deeper lesson. Balance isn’t just about strength or rest.
It’s about finding the right mix of effort and restoration, output and renewal.
So if you’re feeling out of sorts, take a step back and look at the bigger picture. Where in your life have you leaned too far into Yin or Yang?
Trust your intuition. The right answer is already there.
Stay balanced,
Rob
PS: If you’ve been feeling off, it’s time to pay attention to the balance of Yin and Yang in your life.
That’s why I created The Embodied Mindfulness Method.
It’s a free course designed to help you understand these forces and design a practice that actually supports you. You’ll build steadiness, clarity, and strength, without burnout.
And if you want something fully customized, I have space for two private students right now.
We’ll build a practice that actually fits your body, your life, and your energy.
If that sounds like something you need, reach out here, and we’ll set up a meeting.
Yin Yoga for Evening Calm: Gentle Poses for Restful Sleep
Let’s wind down together with this Yin Yoga for Evening Calm practice. In this session, we’ll stay entirely on our backs, using minimal props to help you release tension and gently ease into a restful state. My goal is to guide you through poses that encourage deep relaxation, quiet your mind, and prepare you for a good night’s sleep. This class is your invitation to slow down, breathe, and give yourself the care you deserve.
Resistance Is Not Futile: How to Slay the Distraction Dragon
Dear Reader,
I’ve been lying to you.
Okay, maybe not outright lying. But I haven’t been telling the full truth.
I’ve positioned myself as "Sir Robert: Slayer of Distractions!" A champion of stillness and the mindful path, encouraging you to unplug, find calm, and disconnect.
But here’s the truth. I’m not always as unplugged as I seem.
A few years ago, I quit social media entirely. I didn’t post. I didn’t scroll. My mind felt clear, calm, and free.
It was great for me personally. But I soon realized it wasn’t so great for my business. I was missing opportunities to share my teaching with the world.
So, I reconnected. And then the leaks started.
At first, they were small. I’d check a little here and there. I’d take time to engage with other teachers and creators.
But gradually, I felt the pull growing stronger, and it started to creep into more and more of my day.
Because when you’re creating content, you want to know how it’s doing. You want to take a peek. You want to respond to that latest comment.
And that pull to check, to stay plugged in, is not a coincidence. It’s by design.
Tech companies have built a perfect machine to keep us hooked. They exploit our dopamine systems, locking us into endless loops of scrolling and checking. And it’s not just you and me; it’s all of society.
I fear we’ve become like fish in water, so immersed in distraction that we don’t even notice we’re suffocating.
Today, I want to share how this has shown up in my own life and offer some solutions that have helped me reclaim my sanity and focus.
My hope is they can help you too.
Big Tech Are The Borg
Modern tech companies are like The Borg from Star Trek: relentless, cunning, and always trying to assimilate us.
And they’ve perfectly hacked our psychology.
Likes and notifications give us little dopamine hits. Lockout features keep us tethered to our phones (looking at you, Meta). And their algorithms are perfectly tuned to keep us glued, feeding us exactly what we crave in 30-second bursts.
But this constant stimulation doesn’t just tire us out in the moment. Over time, it chips away at our mental health, our focus, and even our creativity.
Humans evolved in small, quiet groups of about 150 people. We weren’t built to process this much stimulation or to have access to billions of people at once.
When I was a kid, you got your news from a single newspaper. Once you finished reading, you had to wait for the next one to come out.
Now, information is endless.
Even if we browsed 24/7, we wouldn’t get through 0.00000000002% of the content created daily. It’s like trying to drink the ocean with a thimble.
So if you’ve ever felt drained, restless, or dispassionate in the face of this torrent, you’re not alone.
I’ve felt it too.
The more time I spend plugged in, the less motivated I feel. When I spend all day consuming instead of creating, I feel tense, anxious, or even angry.
Even meditation and yoga, the things that usually ground me, take a long time to calm the storm caused by too much screen time.
The social machine is relentless. It wants your attention. It wants to keep you plugged in.
But I’ve also learned something important: The less I engage with it, the better I feel.
Of all the habits I’ve developed, learning to manage my media consumption has been the most transformative.
When I keep it in check, I think more clearly, feel more creative, and have more energy.
I also get something else back. A sense of contentment that feels like it’s missing in the modern age.
How to Slay The Dragon
If you want to slay the distraction dragon for yourself, here are some simple but effective guardrails to help protect your mental health.
1. Intermittent Media Fasting
If you try one thing from this list, let it be this: limit your social media use to specific times.
For me, this means no social media before lunch or after dinner. That gives me a six-hour window to check in and get things done. It’s more than enough, and it protects my best hours from being derailed.
Starting your day with your phone is like setting your brain to chaos mode before you’ve even had coffee. And if you scroll at night, it’ll wreck your sleep and leave you feeling terrible in the morning.
Also, within your window, set a time limit.
I aim for 30 minutes daily, though I stretch this if I’m working on a project.
2. Use Tools to Help You
Willpower is overrated.
Blocking software like Freedom can lock out distractions and keep you focused. You can set it to allow browsing only during specific times, making it a perfect partner to media fasting.
Another trick I use is the Phone Foyer Method. Leave your phone in a designated spot—like near the entrance of your home or on the kitchen counter.
This forces you to physically get up if you want to check it. It’s a great way to avoid getting sucked into mindless doomscrolling on the couch.
3. Replace Distractions With Value
Eliminating distractions isn’t enough. You need to fill the gap with meaningful activities.
The best activities are physical. Go for a walk. Do yoga or qigong. Garden. Move your body in some way—it helps reduce restlessness and gets you out of your head.
It’s even better if you can do these activities with someone else.
Social media tricks us into thinking we’re connecting with others, but it’s a poor substitute for real social interaction. Even watching a show with a friend or partner is better than scrolling alone.
When you need time to yourself, meditation and reading are excellent ways to unwind and reset.
4. Embrace Imperfection
Even with systems in place, I’ve had plenty of slip-ups.
The key is to keep coming back. Remind yourself why you’re doing this in the first place.
The contentment you’ll feel from unplugging is so much better than the quick rush of a social media binge.
In Closing
This isn’t about perfection. It’s about small, consistent steps to reclaim your attention.
Unplugging isn’t just good for you. It’s an act of rebellion and an invitation to reclaim the clarity and contentment that modern life often steals from us.
Every time you resist, you take back a piece of yourself.
Maybe resistance isn’t futile after all.
Stay grounded,
Rob
—
PS: If this message resonates with you, and you’re ready to dive deeper into managing distraction and cultivating calm, I have space for two private students right now.
Together, we’ll create a tailored plan that helps you not just unplug but truly thrive in your life and practices.
If you’re interested, reply to this email.
Yin Yoga for Busy Minds: Find Calm Beneath the Chaos
Yin Yoga for Busy Minds helps you find the natural quiet beneath mental turbulence. This session teaches you to notice the natural stillness within, giving your busy mind a chance to truly relax and unwind.
When the World Is on Fire: What We Can Control?
I thought I had 2025 all figured out.
After some holiday indulgences, I’d settled back into a good routine and felt confident about the year ahead.
But life had other plans.
At first, it was a string of minor inconveniences:
A toy balloon knocked out power in my neighborhood for a day.
My car battery suddenly died, leaving me almost stranded.
Then, reality hit my community much harder.
I watched in horror as my neighbors lost everything in the worst wildfires LA has ever seen.
The city had literal black clouds hanging over it, and I didn’t know if we would be forced to evacuate too.
Suddenly, nothing felt certain anymore.
The real world was here to remind me just how little control we truly have.
When I consider these sorts of moments, whether big or small, I’m reminded of one core truth:
Control is an illusion.
The only things we truly have are our own actions and intentions.
Seneca, the Stoic philosopher, advised:
“It is not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.”
Focus on what you can control, and let go of the rest.
Or, in my favorite moment from The Lord of the Rings:
Frodo: "I wish it need not have happened in my time."
Gandalf: "So do I, and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us."
It’s easy to give in to panic and fear. It’s easy to fall into blame and pointing fingers.
But none of these things can change the world around us, and often they make things worse for everyone involved.
So what can we do when the world is on fire, literally and figuratively?
Take care of yourself first. Fear and panic are natural, but they’re not sustainable. Unplug, pause, and breathe. Whether it’s through stillness, yoga/meditation, or simply taking a walk, find what helps you feel grounded.
Choose how you show up for others. Once you’ve found your footing, ask yourself: How can I help? Will you use moments of struggle to spread lies and score points? Or will you offer support—whether through service, charity, or simply being present for a friend in need?
I was lucky to have not been directly affected by the fires, but so many of my students and people around me were. One student even had their childhood home burnt to the ground.
In those moments, I knew one thing I could offer: my ability to be present. I couldn’t change their circumstances, but I could guide them toward letting go of what was beyond their control.
When the world feels chaotic, sometimes the greatest gift we can give others is our attention, calmness, and care.
By grounding ourselves and choosing intentional action, we can show up as a force for good in an unpredictable world.
The world around us is never under our control, but the way we show up in it always is.
Use these moments to practice compassion, create connection, and help those who may desperately need it.
As a final point, if you want to support the victims of the California fires, please consider donating to the California Fire Foundation or World Central Kitchen. They provide essential support, from assisting displaced families to ensuring first responders and victims have food and shelter.
~ Rob
PS: In times of uncertainty, finding ways to stay grounded and present can make all the difference. If you’re looking for tools to help you cultivate clarity and resilience, my Embodied Mindfulness Membership is open. I also have space for two more private students.
Opening to Awareness With Yin Yoga: Find Clarity and Calm
Opening to awareness is about letting go. In this Yin Yoga practice, I guide you through a yin yoga practice that will help you tune into the natural awareness that’s always present.
With minimal effort and a focus on being, not doing, this session creates space for clarity and calm.
Listening To Silence: A 30 Minute Yin Yoga Practice
Listening to silence is a powerful way to drop into the present moment. In this Yin Yoga practice, I offer minimal cues to help you truly connect with stillness and your inner experience. This quiet, meditative session is perfect for creating space in your body and mind while tuning into the subtle power of silence.
Take Time to Pause and Breathe: A Yin Yoga Practice
Pause and breathe with me in this Yin Yoga practice. I’ll guide you through gentle poses and mindful breathing to help release tension, balance your nervous system, and reconnect with the present moment. Grab a blanket, a couple of blocks, and join me as we create space for stillness and ease.
The 5 Meditation Myths Holding You Back
Meditation comes with a lot of expectations.
Calm. Stillness. Clarity.
But when you sit down to practice, it can feel like you’re doing it all wrong.
Your mind won’t stop racing. You can’t find the perfect cushion. You don’t feel relaxed at all.
That’s because we’ve all been told countless myths about meditation—many of which are flat-out wrong.
Today, I’d like to share five of the most common meditation myths that keep my students stuck.
By learning to let go of these myths, you’ll reconnect with your practice in a way that feels natural, intuitive, and alive.
1. The Myth of Perfect Conditions
We think that meditation requires the right conditions:
Silence.
A pretty space.
The perfect cushion.
But none of these really matter.
Life is noisy. There’s traffic outside. Your kids might be playing in the next room. Maybe your neighbor is mowing the lawn.
These things aren’t barriers to practice—they are the practice.
I’ve even sat on retreats where the near-perfect conditions were constantly shattered by hammering from construction or the whir of a leaf blower.
My teachers reframed these distractions—not as obstacles, but as prime opportunities to notice how my mind reacts.
Because the real work of meditation isn’t about creating ideal conditions. It’s about being present with whatever’s here.
And this applies far beyond formal meditation. Waiting in line, sitting at a stoplight, or riding the bus are perfect opportunities to practice mindfulness.
Perfect conditions are a myth.
Equanimity—the ability to stay grounded no matter what’s happening around you—is the deeper intention.
2. The Myth of a Quiet Mind
“I can’t meditate because my mind won’t stop racing.”
I hear this all the time. It’s one of the biggest misconceptions about meditation.
But meditation isn’t about silencing your thoughts. It’s about noticing them without getting lost in them.
I still remember my first mini-retreat—a six-hour afternoon workshop. I showed up expecting to achieve the blissful, quiet mind I’d imagined.
Instead, my mind spun in circles, and I left feeling frustrated and defeated.
When I told my teacher, he smiled and said, “Sounds like a fruitful retreat.”
At the time, I didn’t get it. Now I do.
The act of noticing your thoughts is the practice. Especially when they feel overwhelming.
Over time, your attachment to thoughts—and your resistance to them—soften. The mind begins to settle, and the stillness that’s already there starts to shine through.
But the irony is, the only way to get there is by allowing your thoughts to just be.
3. The Myth of Relaxation
Meditation is often sold as a way to relax. But that’s not the whole truth.
Yes, meditation can calm the mind. But its real power lies in helping you meet your experience—whether it’s pleasant or not.
In Buddhist teachings, meditation has two aspects: tranquility (shamatha) and insight (vipassana). Tranquility calms the mind. Insight helps you see reality clearly.
Feeling restless or uncomfortable during meditation isn’t a failure. It’s a sign you’re paying attention.
Meditation reveals the mind’s patterns. Over time, you learn to let those patterns come and go without resistance.
This builds equanimity: deep peace that doesn’t depend on circumstances.
Relaxation is part of the process, but it’s not the goal. The goal is to meet your experience as it is, without resistance.
4. The Myth of Enlightenment
Enlightenment feels mystical. Even magical.
Most people see it as a far-off goal, reserved for the most intense practitioners.
But awakening isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about uncovering the reality of what’s already here.
The stillness, clarity, and freedom you’re seeking aren’t outside of you. They’re your natural state. Meditation helps untangle the patterns that obscure them.
Here’s the paradox: if you’re chasing enlightenment as something “out there,” you’re moving further away from it.
Awakening is about waking up to this moment—not striving for some imagined future state.
It’s a gradual process, built through small moments of mindfulness. But it’s accessible. And it’s already here—if you make the space for it.
5. The Myth of Monks and Masters
Many people assume that deep meditation is only for monks or for people who dedicate their entire lives to practice.
Wrong.
Over my years of teaching, I’ve met countless people who’ve achieved profound insights while living “ordinary” lives. Musicians. Professionals. Artists.
Through mindfulness, they transformed their relationship with their otherwise ordinary lives.
Daily life isn’t an obstacle to practice. It’s the ideal place for practice.
You don’t need to meditate in a cave or escape the world to experience transformation.
You just need to commit to showing up.
Mindfulness isn’t about escaping life. It’s about engaging with it fully and meeting everything that arises with presence and equanimity.
What These Myths Have in Common
All of these myths frame meditation as something special or separate from daily life.
But meditation isn’t about perfection. It’s not about creating an ideal state or achieving some mystical goal.
It’s about meeting life as it is. Right now.
You don’t need ideal conditions. You don’t need to silence your mind. You don’t need to relax, escape, or become someone else.
You just need to begin. Again and again.
If these myths have been holding you back, check out my free course, The Embodied Mindfulness Method. It’s a step-by-step guide to integrating meditation and yin yoga into your daily life.
And when you are ready to fully immerse yourself in transfromation, the Embodied Mindfulness Membership is now open.
And if any of these myths resonate with your experience—or if there’s one I missed—I’d love to hear from you. Reply, share your thoughts, or ask a question.
5 Meditation Myths Debunked: What’s Holding Your Practice Back?
Meditation myths debunked! In this video, I break down five common myths about meditation that hold people back from progress. Learn why meditation doesn’t require perfect silence or stopping your thoughts, and how relaxation isn’t the only goal. Discover how to work with real-life challenges and deepen your practice, no matter your experience level.
Whether you’re new to meditation or a seasoned practitioner, this video will help you clear away misconceptions and reconnect with the true purpose of mindfulness.
Yin Yoga for Focused Awareness: Build Concentration Through Mindful Practice
Yin Yoga for Focused Awareness helps you build concentration and anchor attention. This session explores grounding, mindful breathing, and gentle poses to cultivate present-moment focus. Discover how your body and breath can deepen mindfulness and strengthen your ability to stay present.
Why Most People Quit Meditation (And How to Keep Going)
Have you ever sat down to meditate and felt like you were doing it all wrong?
Frustration builds. Your mind won’t stop racing. You start to wonder if you’re wasting your time.
You’re not alone.
I’ve been practicing meditation for nearly 20 years, and I’ve spent 15 of those teaching it to other people.
Over and over, I see the same struggles—frustration, self-doubt, discomfort — come up.
These are the moments when most people give up.
Not because they’re failing, but because they don’t realize that these challenges are the practice.
So today, I’d like to discuss why most people quit meditation and give you some practical tips on how to stick with it when it gets tough.
Unrealistic Expectations
Meditation has a marketing problem.
Movies and pop culture have shown us endless images of cool Zen monks sitting serenely on remote mountaintops.
So when we come to our practice, we feel that by learning a few techniques, we too will be our pathway to instant Zen.
But unfortunately, meditation just doesn’t work like that.
Those calm, peaceful states will come. But they have to be earned through the process of showing up, again and again, especially when it’s hard.
So when you start meditating, expect some chaos. Your mind will be noisy. Your body might resist. But that’s normal.
Over time, as you stay with it, clarity and calm will start to emerge.
Self-Doubt
When you’re sitting there with your mind wandering all over the place, it’s easy to feel like you’re doing it wrong.
You might even think, “Maybe meditation just isn’t for me.”
This kind of doubt is something I hear from students all the time.
But please know that it’s not a sign that you’re failing. It’s a natural part of the process.
Meditation isn’t about having perfect focus or a completely quiet mind. The core of the practice is in showing up, noticing what’s happening, and learning to let go.
Sitting with your doubt instead of running from it builds resilience.
That resilience is the foundation of the transformation you’re looking for.
Physical Discomfort
Let’s be honest. For most of us, sitting still is anything but easy.
If you’re like most people, your body is tight and your posture habits probably aren’t doing you any favors either.
So when you sit down to meditate, discomfort will show up. Usually very quickly.
But instead of seeing this as a problem, I encourage you to work with it as a part of the process.
Discomfort invites you to pay more attention. Can you notice how it feels, how it changes, and what happens when you finally stop resisting it? Over time, discomfort can become one of the most powerful parts of your practice.
That said, preparation helps immensely, and Yin Yoga can be a game-changer for meditation practice.
By releasing deep physical tension and learning how to let go in your body, sitting still becomes far less of a challenge.
If you’re curious, I’ve got dozens of free Yin Yoga videos on my YouTube Channel to help you get started. I also go deep into this subject in my free course: The Embodied Mindfulness Method.
Impatience
Modern life has given us the attention spans of goldfish. (With no offense meant to our aquatic friends.)
In almost everything in life, we think that results should come quickly and that effort should be minimal.
Meditation directly contradicts this pattern. There are no real hacks or shortcuts. It has to be a long-term commitment.
Each session, even the tough ones, is slowly transforming you.
Think of it like learning an instrument. You wouldn’t expect to pick up a bass and play like Flea on day one, or even month one.
Meditation, like all practices, works the same way.
With each session, you are building your skills. Over time, the compound interest will accumulate, and it won’t feel like such a challenge anymore.
Practical Tips to Keep Going
So now that we’ve unpacked some of the why, here are a few strategies that can help you to stick with your meditation practice over the long term:
Start Small: Even a minute counts. It’s better to do a little every day than to aim for long sessions and burn out. As you learn to make the commitment, it will be easier to naturally find time for longer sessions.
Tie It to a Routine: Anchor your meditation to something you already do daily without thinking of it. Think of things like drinking your morning coffee or brushing your teeth. What routine can you add your meditation practice into?
Use Guided Meditations: Guided meditations can be a helpful tool, especially when you’re feeling stuck. But try to mix them with self-guided practice to build independence.
Relax the Body First: Practices like Yin Yoga or even a short walk can help prepare your body and mind for stillness. Please see my YouTube channel if you need a place to start.
Why It Matters
Meditation isn’t about escaping your life. It’s about learning how to show up fully for it.
It’s about reconnecting with what matters most. Not by changing your circumstances but by changing how you relate to them.
Over time, your practice will teach you how to let go of stress, cultivate clarity, and meet challenges steadily.
Each of these small, daily efforts adds up. Each session is a step toward finding balance, and becoming the person who faces life with resilience and presence.
What have been the biggest challenges—or breakthroughs—in your meditation practice?
Leave a comment below. I’d love to hear your story.
If you’re ready to take your practice deeper, check out my free course, The Embodied Mindfulness Method. It combines meditation and Yin Yoga to help you stay consistent and unlock these benefits.
For even more support, my Embodied Mindfulness Membership offers weekly live sessions, a full library of recorded practices, and a community of like-minded practitioners. It’s a space to deepen your practice and stay inspired.
Here's Why Most People Quit Meditation (And How to Keep Going)
Why most people quit meditation (and how to keep going) often comes down to frustration, self-doubt, or physical discomfort. In this video, I explain why most people quit meditation and share actionable tips to help you keep going when it feels challenging. We’ll tackle the unrealistic expectations, self-doubt, and discomfort that cause so many people to quit. By sticking with meditation, you’ll build a habit that brings clarity, calm, and growth.
Release Tension with Yin Yoga | Quiet the Mind, Free the Body
Release tension with Yin Yoga and stop letting stress take over your body and mind.
Tension in your body isn’t random, it’s a signal from your mind.
This practice uses Yin Yoga to help you let go of that tension, physically and mentally, so you can move and think more clearly.
Grab two blocks and a blanket for this session.
Calm in the Chaos: Yin Yoga for Mental Stillness | Find Peace Through Your Body
Life won’t stop just because you’re overwhelmed. Calm in the Chaos: Yin Yoga for Mental Stillness is about learning to stay grounded when everything feels like too much. Through Yin Yoga, we’ll anchor in the body, quiet the mental noise, and find a stillness that doesn’t depend on things going perfectly.
The World Will Never Slow Down—But You Always Can
If you’re a human alive on this planet right now, you’ve likely noticed the immense sense of turbulence in the air.
The world feels more divided than ever. Fingers are being pointed in all directions. Everyone claims to have answers, but clarity remains elusive.
It’s easy to feel trapped in a vortex with no way out.
But here’s a truth you can always count on:
While the world will never slow down for us, we always have the power to slow down for ourselves.
Staying plugged in is seductive.
It feels comforting, necessary even.
We want to read the latest headline, watch the cute cat video, laugh at the newest meme.
But ultimately, it's all just adding fuel to the fire.
Instead, in the face of uncertainty, the answer is to take back control of what you can.
Unplugging from the noise isn't just rebellious; it's essential.
It can give you the clarity you've been searching for.
Here is my invitation for you.
This weekend:
Unplug: Put down your phone. Turn off the news. Give it a break.
Connect: Get back in your body. Go for a long walk. Try a Yin Yoga session—there are dozens on my YouTube page. Do something physical.
Be Still: Sit in meditation for at least 5 minutes. Try for even longer if you can.
Reflect: Observe any changes in your mood or clarity. Consider jotting down your thoughts in a journal.
While we can't control the world, we can always control our response to it.
By taking charge of your environment and behaviors, you can craft the life of clarity that you’re seeking.
It doesn't take much; just honest intention and a little time.
I’d love to hear how this experience goes for you. Please coment and share your thoughts!
For those ready to dive deeper, I'd like to invite you to join me for my new Embodied Mindfulness Membership.
It will give you the tools and the guidance you need to thrive in this turbulent time.
What's Inside:
Live Yin Yoga Sessions Twice a Week; all added to an ever-growing practice library.
Guided Meditations and Talks.
Supportive Community.
Optional 1-1 Guidance.
The program begins on December 1st. Sign up before January 1st to receive 50% off your first month.
Click here to schedule a meeting to see if the program is a good fit.
The Sneaky Little Jerk Messing With Your Meditation
The Struggle of Showing Up
It’s 6 am, and while the world outside is still dark and quiet, you’re awake and sitting on your meditation cushion.
Your neck is stiff; your back is sore.
Your mind swirls with half-thoughts—yesterday’s to-do list, fragments of dreams, and a fog that just lingers.
And then there’s that nagging doubt: 'Why am I even here? What’s the point?'
But here’s the thing: transformation in practice doesn’t happen when everything feels perfect.
It happens because you keep showing up, especially on the days when it feels challenging.
Doubt is a Sneaky Little Jerk
Doubt is sneaky.
It whispers that you’re wasting your time, even when things are going well.
And while tension and restlessness hit you directly, doubt creeps in quietly.
It’s that voice that tells you to quit. The one that tells you to constantly shift your posture. And the voice that tells you that none of it is working.
Remember—all meditators experience doubt, and it’s often a sign that the practice is working.
But if you’re feeling doubt, you’ve already cleared the toughest hurdle: showing up.
Because the consistency and motivation to show up day after day is undeniably the most critical factor in a transformative practice.
Consistency is the Key
A famous Japanese proverb says:
“Even dust, when piled high, can make a mountain.”
Chiri mo tsumoreba, yama to naru
ちりも積もれば、山となる。
I heard this proverb years ago, and it struck me because it speaks to the power of the smallest actions. It reminds you that each time you show up, you add another grain of dust to the mountain of practice—small efforts that build something monumental over time.
But this metaphor goes even further when you consider the infinite potential moments of mindfulness throughout your day.
So, the next time you’re stuck in traffic, can you feel the texture of the steering wheel under your hands? While waiting in line, can you feel your weight shift as you stand or notice the sounds around you? Even right now, can you notice your next breath?
Each mindful moment adds another grain of attention to your day.
The more you weave these moments in, the stronger your focus becomes.
And this will lead to more presence and less doubt when you sit down on your cushion for formal practice.
Small Steps, Big Changes
Getting lost in your head and stuck on your expectations about practice is easy.
But the most crucial part is the intention to keep going and to keep showing up, day after day, month after month, year after year.
Just like drops of water can slowly smooth out a rough rock, your daily practice gradually softens and smooths out the rough edges in your mind.
I see this all the time in my students.
The ones who most consistently commit to showing up on the mat are the ones who experience the most profound changes in their bodies and minds.
And all of these profound changes are built during each unit of practice.
Because, in the end, transformation isn’t sudden.
Keep showing up, and those small moments will create something life-changing.
While showing up is the most crucial factor, having a guide can accelerate your progress and help you to truly thrive on the path.
This is where the Embodied Mindfulness Program helps you stay consistent over the long term.
This ongoing membership will give you access to regular practices, support, and a community to help you succeed in your practice.
Let’s chat and see if the program is the right fit for you.
The Toughest Practice You’ve Probably Never Tried
The Misunderstood Practice
Yin Yoga just doesn’t get any respect…
In my 15 years as a teacher, I’ve had to explain what the practice is all about more times than I can count.
Even after countless explanations, people still don’t seem to grasp its depth.
They shrug it off as nothing more than a deep stretch class.
Or they assume it’s a restorative session meant to simply help you unwind.
Sure, deep stretches and relaxation are part of Yin Yoga, but they only scratch the surface of what it truly offers.
The most frustrating misconception is the idea that Yin Yoga is a beginner’s class.
That it doesn’t measure up to the more dynamic practices like Ashtanga or Vinyasa.
Nothing could be further from the truth.
Yin Yoga is a complete practice, and in many ways, it’s more potent than some of its more athletic cousins.
If you think Yin Yoga is simply ‘gentle,’ you’ve got the completely wrong idea.
Today, I want to show you why Yin Yoga is one of the most demanding practices and how it can cultivate an unshakeable sense of strength in everything you do.
The Challenge of Yin Yoga
Whenever I hear someone dismiss Yin Yoga, I have to assume they’ve never truly dived into it or taken a properly taught class.
Because if you’ve ever held Dragon Pose for four minutes, you know it’s not for the faint-hearted.
The intention of Yin Yoga is to teach you how to play at your edge.
Not at your absolute edge but to a place of discomfort that will absolutely make you notice.
Because it’s at that intersection where discomfort meets stillness that you’ll get a real chance to transform.
Physically, that discomfort is a sign that you have gotten past simple relaxation and into working with your deeper connective tissues.
These tendons, ligaments, and fascia often get ignored in more active practices.
But even more importantly, you will test your ability to remain calm against resistance.
In Yin Yoga, your primary challenge isn’t in the body—it’s in the mind.
Building Mental Resilience
Your mind will resist.
It will spin stories and try to make you quit.
It will tell you that you’re too uncomfortable, that you can’t hold the pose any longer, that you need to move.
This is where you have the opportunity to meet that resistance with stillness instead.
(This doesn’t mean you should ignore pain, but rather that you learn how to honestly assess and navigate everyday resistance.)
You’ll learn to find true mental resilience that few other practices can cultivate.
You’ll find a different kind of strength, one that’s quieter but no less powerful than brute force.
It’s ironic how so many ‘tough’ guys who brag about pushing through in the weight room couldn’t make it through a 4 minute Dragon Pose.
Because being still—truly still—requires real toughness.
But Yin Yoga is more than just a mental challenge; it’s a practice that physically rebuilds your body to be stronger, more resilient, and more balanced.
Strengthening the Body from the Inside Out
The long, deep holds in Yin Yoga create positive stress on the deep connective tissues, which are responsible for the body’s structural integrity.
Unlike muscles, these tissues don’t respond to quick, repetitive movements.
They demand slow, deliberate tension or pressure.
There are no quick fixes here.
This is exactly what Yin Yoga provides.
When you stay in a pose for several minutes, you’re giving your body the time it needs to adapt and strengthen these tissues.
And it’s not just about being flexible.
You’re building a body that’s resilient and adaptable.
This goes far beyond what a simple deep stretch can give you.
But the benefits of Yin Yoga go beyond the physical.
Hidden Emotional and Energetic Benefits
Each session acts as an energetic tune-up, clearing blockages and stimulating the energy channels in your body.
It’s even been said that Yin Yoga is like getting acupuncture without the needles.
The practice opens up these energy pathways, ensuring that your subtle energy, or “qi,” flows smoothly throughout your body.
When energy flows freely, you feel more vibrant, more alive, and more in tune with yourself.
There are emotional and psychological benefits too.
When you hold these deep stretches, you inevitably encounter repressed emotions.
As your body releases tension, old emotions rise to the surface, giving you the chance to process and heal.
The physical release becomes a bridge to deeper emotional healing.
You might find yourself suddenly overwhelmed with sadness or anger in a pose that seems innocent on the surface.
That’s not a sign that something’s wrong; it’s a sign that something’s finally being released.
The emotional release that comes with Yin Yoga can be as transformative as the physical benefits.
It’s a form of therapy that works from the inside out, addressing issues you might not even know you were holding onto.
On a more practical level, your Yin Yoga practice serves as a laboratory for how you handle stress in daily life.
Applying Yin Yoga to Daily Life
If you can cultivate patience in a long-held pose, you’ll find yourself more patient the next time you’re stuck in traffic or dealing with a difficult situation at work.
Yin Yoga teaches you to breathe through discomfort, to find stillness in chaos, and to stay centered no matter what’s happening around you.
It’s the ideal setting for developing the mental grit that will carry over into all areas of your life.
It’s a prime example of how working gently can actually make you stronger.
The Missing Piece in Your Strength Routine
If you’re already working out regularly to build strength, adding Yin Yoga to your routine could be the missing piece to completing the picture.
It’s the lesser-known, underdog practice that can elevate your wellness to a new level.
And it doesn’t take much to start seeing the benefits.
Just 2 sessions a week to start is enough to start noticing massive changes. (This is why my Embodied Mindfulness program is built around two weekly Yin Yoga sessions.)
You can start right now using these videos on my YouTube page.
The True Power of Yin Yoga
Stillness is misunderstood.
You might tend to think of it as ‘giving up,’ but it’s actually more like diving in.
Diving deep into your mind, into your body, into all the forms of the present moment.
Commit to regular practice, and you’ll uncover a strength within you that goes beyond the physical, extending deeply into your mental and emotional resilience.
Yin Yoga isn’t merely about flexibility; it’s a path to fortitude, resilience, and the enduring strength that sustains you in every aspect of life.
If you want guidance on your own journey towards awakening, please consider joining The Embodied Mindfulness Program.
Contact me, and we’ll set up a call to see if the program is right for you!
Hi, I'm Rob! I teach Yoga and Meditation in West LA and Online.
You can learn a bit more about me here, in my bio.
Also, check out my public class schedule and upcoming workshops to practice with me in person, or online!