Letting Go of the Things That Define You
On an average day back in the early 2000s, I wandered the shelves of Barnes & Noble near my hometown in Princeton, NJ.
I was at a crossroads in my life. I had just started studying music at my local community college, with my sights set on transferring to Berklee College of Music in Boston. I was putting the ghosts of my past behind me and looking toward a bigger future.
It’s a phase you’ve probably been through yourself. That moment when your identity is just starting to solidify, but the future still feels like a blank slate.
It was in that headspace, searching for something to define the next chapter of my life, that I spotted it—hidden on a back shelf in the music section: The Ambient Century by Mark Pendergrast.
The minimalist cover—a simple waveform and a mid-century font—drew me in immediately.
But it wasn’t just the design. Inside was a rich history of Ambient music, tracing its evolution from early 20th-century composers to the modern DJs I admired. It tied everything together in a sweeping, academic, and deeply inspiring guide.
And in that moment, I knew I had to have it.
Because for me, at that time, this book wasn’t just a book. It felt like me—or at least, the version of me I wanted to become. It was a reflection of my aspirations, my identity, and my future all wrapped up in those pages.
What I didn’t know at the time was how long that book would follow me.
From NJ to Boston. Through six apartments in Boston. From Boston to DC and two apartments there. And finally, from DC to Los Angeles. For over 20 years, it wasn’t just a book I carried. It was a piece of a past self, a reminder of who I was trying to be.
But there was just one problem.
For all those years, the book mostly sat on my shelf, gathering dust. Despite how important it felt, I almost never read it.
The moments it got the most attention were during my moves, when I’d pick it up and ask myself: “Do I still need this?” And for over 20 years, the answer was always yes.
But just a few days ago, as I prepared for my biggest move yet—to Japan—I found myself holding that same book again. The cover is now worn, and the pages have yellowed. But this time, something shifted.
For the first time, I fully realized: I’m not that person anymore.
That version of me has long since passed. And with that, the things I held onto—like this book—needed to change too.
What We Hold Onto
In that moment, I understood something profound: many of the things we keep—whether they serve a purpose or not—become physical expressions of who we used to be.
We hold onto them because they symbolize a part of our identity, a phase of life we haven't fully let go of. That book was more than just a reminder of my musical aspirations; it was a reminder of a version of myself that no longer fit the life I was living.
And so, like so many other relics of my past, I decided to let it go.
The Things You Keep
Modern life gives you few limits on how much stuff you can have.
And most of what you own feels like more than just things. They’re pieces of your identity and artifacts of your journey.
But here’s the thing: what you think of as your identity isn’t fixed. And neither is anything else.
The Buddha taught that all things are impermanent. And because of this, what you perceive as ‘self’ is always changing.
While there’s a place for keepsakes and mementos, the version of you those things represent is no longer here.
When you cling to your past self, you risk missing out on your present reality—or even your future potential.
Holding onto things that no longer serve you keeps you anchored to a past version of yourself. But letting go opens up space for the person you’re becoming.
What are you holding onto that might no longer be serving you?
Letting Go Doesn’t Mean Eliminating Everything
Letting go doesn’t mean purging everything you own or forgetting your past.
Some things are truly valuable, and others carry deep meaning for who you are today.
The real power lies in recognizing how your attachments shape your identity. Some belongings serve you, but others weigh you down.
The question is whether you still need that old identity—or if the item is cluttering up your life and mind.
You can always ask yourself: Does this still serve me? How does this fit into my current life?
The more you ask these questions, the easier it becomes to release what no longer serves you.
And if we can do this within the practice of mindfulness, we discover something even deeper: beyond the content of each moment is the awareness in which we experience them.
That is what never changes.
I would love to hear what you’re ready to release. Send me a note or comment and let me know.
~ Rob
PS: As I reflect on the privilege of choosing what to keep or let go, I’m reminded of my neighbors in the Palisades who had everything taken from them without choice.
If you're able, please consider donating to the California Community Foundation or World Central Kitchen to support those affected.
The Biggest Transition of My Life (So Far)
I’ve never been someone who talks about “signs from the universe.”
Sure, I stay in tune with nature. I follow my intuition. But it’s usually more of an ebb and flow — not some lightning-strike moment of clarity.
That was until April 9, 2023.
My wife, Carrie, and I had just returned to Japan for the first time since the pandemic. It was our fourth visit together.
While our flight arrived late and immigration was a mess, something felt different.
Despite the heavy jet lag, I woke up that first morning with a deep sense of peace and ease.
Honestly, I can’t recall ever feeling so clear.
It was as if the universe was saying: This is where you need to be.
In other words, it felt like I had arrived home.
That afternoon, as we sat on a bench in Roppongi, I turned to Carrie and said, "Babes, we HAVE to live here."
From that moment on, we started scheming.
Over the next two years, we navigated shifting plans and unexpected challenges.
Sometimes, it felt like a pipe dream, but we kept working toward it.
And now, almost exactly two years later, we’ve made it happen.
We’re moving to Tokyo on April 1st.
We’ve just been approved by Japanese immigration to live there for at least a year under student visas while enrolling in a Japanese language program.
This is our next step, and hopefully, the beginning of something much longer.
And despite all the challenges behind us—and the many still ahead—I’ve returned to that same feeling of clarity I had on that April morning two years ago.
In my heart, I know this is the right path.
What This Move Means for My Teaching
I know many of you might be wondering how this move will impact my teaching, so I want to be as transparent as possible about what’s ahead.
As clear as I feel, this transition is also bittersweet.
Living and teaching in LA has been an amazing chapter in my life. In many ways, it feels like I found myself here. I truly love this city, and I have a feeling I’ll be back again someday.
I’m also deeply grateful for the connections I’ve made with students and fellow teachers.
At the same time, I know this next step will allow me to offer something even bigger.
Here’s what’s happening over the next few months:
My in-person classes in LA will end after the second week of March. This part is tough. I’ll miss seeing you all before and during class, and the shared energy that comes with practicing together. If you’re local, I’d love to see you before I leave.
My livestream-only classes will continue through the end of March. If you’ve been practicing with me online, you can still join me through March, but I’ll be pausing live classes for a bit once we land in Japan. Life will be too chaotic at first, and I need time to figure out how everything will fit together.
For my private online students: I’ll still be available for 1:1 sessions, but I’ll need to adjust scheduling based on the time difference. If you’re working with me privately, I’ll reach out soon to discuss next steps.
April will be a huge transition month. I’ll be taking a short pause on online classes while I get settled. But I’ll still be showing up through writing and video content.
More content for YouTube & my newsletter. Even while my live classes are paused, I’ll be putting more energy into high-quality content on other platforms. I want to make sure you still have access to teachings, and I’m sure this whole process will give me plenty to reflect on and share.
By May, I’ll be relaunching my Embodied Mindfulness Membership. This will be the biggest shift in my teaching, creating a consistent online home for students to practice with me no matter where they are in the world.
A Reimagined Embodied Mindfulness Membership
Starting in May, I’ll be completely revamping my monthly Embodied Mindfulness Membership to better serve my students.
Each week, I’ll offer:
One Hatha practice (similar to my Level 1/2 classes at Circle Yoga)
One Flow practice (similar to my midday flow at Dragon’s Breath Yoga)
Two Yin Yoga classes (the heart of my teaching)
Since the time zone difference may make live attendance tricky, all classes will be recorded and available within 24 hours. The library will continue to grow, so you’ll always have new practices to explore, and you can revisit your favorites as often as you like!
The program will be $97/month, but as a thank-you to my current students, I’m offering a lifetime 25% discount to those who sign up at launch.
(Reply to this email if you’d like to be on the early access list.)
The Road Ahead
The next few months will be a whirlwind.
But through it all, I’m grateful to have my mindfulness and Yin practice to keep me grounded.
To my LA students, I will miss you deeply. But I hope we can stay connected through my online offerings.
And to everyone reading, I’d love to hear your thoughts or questions.
I’ll continue sharing reflections here as I move through this transition. There’s so much ahead, and I’m excited to explore it with you.
—Rob
The Radical Rebellion of Not Being a Jerk
"Even if the whole universe is nothing but a bunch of jerks doing all kinds of jerk-type things, there is still liberation in simply not being a jerk."
— Zen Master Dogen (translated by Brad Warner)
It seems like there are more jerks than ever these days.
From the top down, cruelty, corruption, and general jerkitude have become the default operating system of the world.
And yet, you see the damage this causes.
Anger only fuels more anger.
Some people tear everything down but never build anything better.
A world run by jerks becomes more miserable for everyone.
It’s easy to feel disheartened. It’s easy to let despair take root.
And yet, one of the simplest, most powerful acts of rebellion you have is to resist your worst impulses.
In a world full of jerks, simply not being a jerk is its own revolution.
The True Meaning of “Not Being a Jerk”
It’s easy to confuse kindness with passivity.
It’s easy to get lost in platitudes and Pollyanna-style thinking. Some people believe that being "nice" means looking the other way, keeping quiet, or avoiding conflict.
But that’s not what this is about.
What Dogen is really making the case for is Ethics — a concise, intentional way of navigating the world, both in how you treat others and in how you manage your own internal state.
Because your actions and your inner world are not separate.
The way you act is always a reflection of your inner state.
The way you act also shapes your inner state.
When people act in cruel or selfish ways, their minds are already filled with anger, fear, and delusion.
But what we often forget is that the opposite is also true.
When you choose integrity over impulse, generosity over selfishness, and wisdom over reactivity, you shape your mind in the process.
This is the foundation of a virtuous cycle.
It transforms you from the inside and ripples outward into the world.
Start Small, But Think Big
This practice can begin with the most mundane of things:
Letting someone merge into your lane in the middle of a traffic jam.
Returning the shopping cart to the rack instead of leaving it in the parking lot.
Resisting the urge to gossip with your coworkers about “that one” person in the office.
On their own, these might seem like trivial behaviors. But when done consistently and with intention, these small acts begin to reprogram the way you think and the way you move through the world.
Each time you choose the path of the “non-jerk,” you’re turning your attention away from your own ego. This simple redirection starts to soften the mind. It creates a spaciousness where the usual stresses and anxieties lose their grip.
With every small, intentional act, you are quietly laying the foundation for something much larger.
Over time, this practice builds the resilience and clarity you’ll need to face the bigger challenges in life when integrity and strength matter most.
When the World Feels Hopeless, You Become the Beacon
There are moments when everything seems like it’s spiraling into jerk-fueled chaos.
And I want to be completely clear about something:
Much of what’s happening in the world right now goes far beyond just “jerk behavior.”
Some of it is dangerous, and some of it causes real suffering.
Knowing this, there is a place for righteous anger. And there is a place for decisive action.
But there’s a difference between taking action and getting consumed.
Are you channeling your appropriate outrage into something meaningful?
Or are you just feeding your own fire? Are you getting lost in cycles of despair, doomscrolling, or empty venting?
This is where mindfulness becomes the key.
In every moment, you have a choice:
Do you react with more anger and add to the fire?
Do you turn away and let things continue unchecked?
Or do you show up with strength and ethics, without being consumed by the negativity around you?
And this isn’t just about “doing good” for others.
It’s about creating an inner foundation of steadiness and clarity so that you can engage fully without losing yourself.
When you train yourself through mindfulness, self-reflection, and intentional action, you build the ability to stand firm in the world without being swept away by it.
When There Is Nothing You Can Do
You don’t have to fight every battle.
Some problems are too vast to fix alone. When that’s the case, turn your attention to what you can control. Take care of your body. Steady your mind. Support the people around you.
Remember, your inner jerk is at its strongest when exhaustion or anger is all you have left.
Taking care of yourself is not retreating. It is how you keep yourself ready for the bigger journey.
Even the smallest acts help lay the foundation for transforming both your inner world and the world around you.
Start Today
The path of the non-jerk isn’t easy.
Human beings evolved to react. To protect themselves. To serve their own interests.
But you also have the ability to choose.
Every moment of intention is an opportunity to train yourself in a better way.
No matter what’s happening in the world, no matter how many jerks are running the show, you always have control over your own actions.
And the more you act with integrity, the better the world becomes—not just for others, but for you as well.
It’s not an easy path.
But it’s the right one.
I invite you to walk it with me.
~ Rob
P.S. – If you ever need support, whether it’s someone to talk to or guidance on practice, please don’t hesitate to reach out.
I’m always happy to chat via email or a free call.
And if you’re looking for deep, customized support in building a practice that fits your life, I currently have space for just one more private student. If that’s you, let’s talk.
Contact Me Here
Yin Yoga for Inner Stillness: Find Calm in Chaos | A Deeply Grounding Practice
When life feels overwhelming, pause and find your center with this practice: Yin Yoga for Inner Stillness: Find Calm in Chaos. Through long, mindful holds, you’ll release stress, quiet your mind, and restore balance.
This session is designed to settle your nervous system, ease tension, and bring you back to center—no matter what’s happening around you.
What You’ll Experience in This Class:
~ Deeply restorative Yin Yoga poses for inner stillness
~ Mindfulness to quiet a busy mind
~ A calming sequence to reduce stress and anxiety
~ A chance to slow down, reset, and feel truly present
Who This Class is For:
If you’re feeling anxious, overstimulated, or in need of clarity, this class will help you find calm and stability. Whether you’re navigating stress or simply seeking stillness, these poses will ground you.
How Giving Up Strength Training Made Me Even Stronger
For the past two years, my mornings have focused on strength.
First, it was calisthenics, a more focused bodyweight practice than yoga asana could give me.
I worked through progressions, perfected my form, and got stronger than ever. But I was also constantly sore and tired.
I didn’t realize it yet, but this pointed to a bigger problem.
So I shifted to kettlebells.
A simple routine of heavy swings and Turkish get-ups. And for a while, it felt great.
Then something started to change.
I wasn’t recovering as well. My sleep got lighter. Instead of feeling energized, I felt wired.
And when I sat down for meditation, my nervous system was running on overdrive. I wasn’t able to drop in.
At first, I tried to push through, waiting for my body to adapt. But that moment never really came.
Because the problem wasn’t adaptation. It was a lack of deeper balance.
Strength Wasn’t the Problem. Imbalance Was.
Since I teach yoga full-time, I already get plenty of movement.
My days are filled with asana. So I leaned on strength training as my counterbalance.
But I had missed the big picture.
My strength training was pushing me too far into Yang energy. Because of this imbalance, I wasn’t able to recover or find my natural equilibrium.
And it wasn’t just the training that was depleting me.
I had also been creating constantly.
Between teaching, writing, and building my business, I was in constant output mode.
This, too, was Yang energy. Driven, focused, expansive.
My entire lifestyle tilted toward Yang, and my body needed the opposite.
Yin and Yang: The Art of Listening
In Taoist philosophy, Yin and Yang aren’t just abstract ideas. They describe how energy moves through everything—your body, your mind, your practice.
Yang is active. It fuels strength, movement, creativity, and expansion.
Yin is receptive. It fosters softness, stillness, restoration, and integration.
And here’s the thing. Most people are stuck in constant Yang mode without realizing it.
If your life is full of stress, intensity, and deadlines, throwing yourself into high-output workouts might not be the right answer.
If you feel sluggish, scattered, or unmotivated, deep restoration alone might not be enough.
The key isn’t doing more or less. It’s doing what’s needed.
And most people aren’t listening.
My Body Needed a Different Kind of Practice
So I made a change.
Instead of reaching for a kettlebell, I returned to my Qigong practice for my morning movement.
It’s not yoga or weights, but it’s still a powerful way to start my day. It allows me to work with subtle energy in a way that feels natural. I can move my whole body without wearing myself out, and it seamlessly integrates the principles of Yin and Yang.
I felt the difference within days.
I was less wired, more steady. My nervous system began to rebalance, and everything started to feel right again.
This doesn’t mean I’ve quit strength training forever. Strength training is awesome. And necessary.
But balance sometimes means accepting seasonality.
There’s a time for building and a time for restoration. Right now, my body needs the latter.
And that’s the deeper lesson. Balance isn’t just about strength or rest.
It’s about finding the right mix of effort and restoration, output and renewal.
So if you’re feeling out of sorts, take a step back and look at the bigger picture. Where in your life have you leaned too far into Yin or Yang?
Trust your intuition. The right answer is already there.
Stay balanced,
Rob
PS: If you’ve been feeling off, it’s time to pay attention to the balance of Yin and Yang in your life.
That’s why I created The Embodied Mindfulness Method.
It’s a free course designed to help you understand these forces and design a practice that actually supports you. You’ll build steadiness, clarity, and strength, without burnout.
And if you want something fully customized, I have space for two private students right now.
We’ll build a practice that actually fits your body, your life, and your energy.
If that sounds like something you need, reach out here, and we’ll set up a meeting.
Yin Yoga for Evening Calm: Gentle Poses for Restful Sleep
Let’s wind down together with this Yin Yoga for Evening Calm practice. In this session, we’ll stay entirely on our backs, using minimal props to help you release tension and gently ease into a restful state. My goal is to guide you through poses that encourage deep relaxation, quiet your mind, and prepare you for a good night’s sleep. This class is your invitation to slow down, breathe, and give yourself the care you deserve.
Resistance Is Not Futile: How to Slay the Distraction Dragon
Dear Reader,
I’ve been lying to you.
Okay, maybe not outright lying. But I haven’t been telling the full truth.
I’ve positioned myself as "Sir Robert: Slayer of Distractions!" A champion of stillness and the mindful path, encouraging you to unplug, find calm, and disconnect.
But here’s the truth. I’m not always as unplugged as I seem.
A few years ago, I quit social media entirely. I didn’t post. I didn’t scroll. My mind felt clear, calm, and free.
It was great for me personally. But I soon realized it wasn’t so great for my business. I was missing opportunities to share my teaching with the world.
So, I reconnected. And then the leaks started.
At first, they were small. I’d check a little here and there. I’d take time to engage with other teachers and creators.
But gradually, I felt the pull growing stronger, and it started to creep into more and more of my day.
Because when you’re creating content, you want to know how it’s doing. You want to take a peek. You want to respond to that latest comment.
And that pull to check, to stay plugged in, is not a coincidence. It’s by design.
Tech companies have built a perfect machine to keep us hooked. They exploit our dopamine systems, locking us into endless loops of scrolling and checking. And it’s not just you and me; it’s all of society.
I fear we’ve become like fish in water, so immersed in distraction that we don’t even notice we’re suffocating.
Today, I want to share how this has shown up in my own life and offer some solutions that have helped me reclaim my sanity and focus.
My hope is they can help you too.
Big Tech Are The Borg
Modern tech companies are like The Borg from Star Trek: relentless, cunning, and always trying to assimilate us.
And they’ve perfectly hacked our psychology.
Likes and notifications give us little dopamine hits. Lockout features keep us tethered to our phones (looking at you, Meta). And their algorithms are perfectly tuned to keep us glued, feeding us exactly what we crave in 30-second bursts.
But this constant stimulation doesn’t just tire us out in the moment. Over time, it chips away at our mental health, our focus, and even our creativity.
Humans evolved in small, quiet groups of about 150 people. We weren’t built to process this much stimulation or to have access to billions of people at once.
When I was a kid, you got your news from a single newspaper. Once you finished reading, you had to wait for the next one to come out.
Now, information is endless.
Even if we browsed 24/7, we wouldn’t get through 0.00000000002% of the content created daily. It’s like trying to drink the ocean with a thimble.
So if you’ve ever felt drained, restless, or dispassionate in the face of this torrent, you’re not alone.
I’ve felt it too.
The more time I spend plugged in, the less motivated I feel. When I spend all day consuming instead of creating, I feel tense, anxious, or even angry.
Even meditation and yoga, the things that usually ground me, take a long time to calm the storm caused by too much screen time.
The social machine is relentless. It wants your attention. It wants to keep you plugged in.
But I’ve also learned something important: The less I engage with it, the better I feel.
Of all the habits I’ve developed, learning to manage my media consumption has been the most transformative.
When I keep it in check, I think more clearly, feel more creative, and have more energy.
I also get something else back. A sense of contentment that feels like it’s missing in the modern age.
How to Slay The Dragon
If you want to slay the distraction dragon for yourself, here are some simple but effective guardrails to help protect your mental health.
1. Intermittent Media Fasting
If you try one thing from this list, let it be this: limit your social media use to specific times.
For me, this means no social media before lunch or after dinner. That gives me a six-hour window to check in and get things done. It’s more than enough, and it protects my best hours from being derailed.
Starting your day with your phone is like setting your brain to chaos mode before you’ve even had coffee. And if you scroll at night, it’ll wreck your sleep and leave you feeling terrible in the morning.
Also, within your window, set a time limit.
I aim for 30 minutes daily, though I stretch this if I’m working on a project.
2. Use Tools to Help You
Willpower is overrated.
Blocking software like Freedom can lock out distractions and keep you focused. You can set it to allow browsing only during specific times, making it a perfect partner to media fasting.
Another trick I use is the Phone Foyer Method. Leave your phone in a designated spot—like near the entrance of your home or on the kitchen counter.
This forces you to physically get up if you want to check it. It’s a great way to avoid getting sucked into mindless doomscrolling on the couch.
3. Replace Distractions With Value
Eliminating distractions isn’t enough. You need to fill the gap with meaningful activities.
The best activities are physical. Go for a walk. Do yoga or qigong. Garden. Move your body in some way—it helps reduce restlessness and gets you out of your head.
It’s even better if you can do these activities with someone else.
Social media tricks us into thinking we’re connecting with others, but it’s a poor substitute for real social interaction. Even watching a show with a friend or partner is better than scrolling alone.
When you need time to yourself, meditation and reading are excellent ways to unwind and reset.
4. Embrace Imperfection
Even with systems in place, I’ve had plenty of slip-ups.
The key is to keep coming back. Remind yourself why you’re doing this in the first place.
The contentment you’ll feel from unplugging is so much better than the quick rush of a social media binge.
In Closing
This isn’t about perfection. It’s about small, consistent steps to reclaim your attention.
Unplugging isn’t just good for you. It’s an act of rebellion and an invitation to reclaim the clarity and contentment that modern life often steals from us.
Every time you resist, you take back a piece of yourself.
Maybe resistance isn’t futile after all.
Stay grounded,
Rob
—
PS: If this message resonates with you, and you’re ready to dive deeper into managing distraction and cultivating calm, I have space for two private students right now.
Together, we’ll create a tailored plan that helps you not just unplug but truly thrive in your life and practices.
If you’re interested, reply to this email.
Yin Yoga for Busy Minds: Find Calm Beneath the Chaos
Yin Yoga for Busy Minds helps you find the natural quiet beneath mental turbulence. This session teaches you to notice the natural stillness within, giving your busy mind a chance to truly relax and unwind.
When the World Is on Fire: What We Can Control?
I thought I had 2025 all figured out.
After some holiday indulgences, I’d settled back into a good routine and felt confident about the year ahead.
But life had other plans.
At first, it was a string of minor inconveniences:
A toy balloon knocked out power in my neighborhood for a day.
My car battery suddenly died, leaving me almost stranded.
Then, reality hit my community much harder.
I watched in horror as my neighbors lost everything in the worst wildfires LA has ever seen.
The city had literal black clouds hanging over it, and I didn’t know if we would be forced to evacuate too.
Suddenly, nothing felt certain anymore.
The real world was here to remind me just how little control we truly have.
When I consider these sorts of moments, whether big or small, I’m reminded of one core truth:
Control is an illusion.
The only things we truly have are our own actions and intentions.
Seneca, the Stoic philosopher, advised:
“It is not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.”
Focus on what you can control, and let go of the rest.
Or, in my favorite moment from The Lord of the Rings:
Frodo: "I wish it need not have happened in my time."
Gandalf: "So do I, and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us."
It’s easy to give in to panic and fear. It’s easy to fall into blame and pointing fingers.
But none of these things can change the world around us, and often they make things worse for everyone involved.
So what can we do when the world is on fire, literally and figuratively?
Take care of yourself first. Fear and panic are natural, but they’re not sustainable. Unplug, pause, and breathe. Whether it’s through stillness, yoga/meditation, or simply taking a walk, find what helps you feel grounded.
Choose how you show up for others. Once you’ve found your footing, ask yourself: How can I help? Will you use moments of struggle to spread lies and score points? Or will you offer support—whether through service, charity, or simply being present for a friend in need?
I was lucky to have not been directly affected by the fires, but so many of my students and people around me were. One student even had their childhood home burnt to the ground.
In those moments, I knew one thing I could offer: my ability to be present. I couldn’t change their circumstances, but I could guide them toward letting go of what was beyond their control.
When the world feels chaotic, sometimes the greatest gift we can give others is our attention, calmness, and care.
By grounding ourselves and choosing intentional action, we can show up as a force for good in an unpredictable world.
The world around us is never under our control, but the way we show up in it always is.
Use these moments to practice compassion, create connection, and help those who may desperately need it.
As a final point, if you want to support the victims of the California fires, please consider donating to the California Fire Foundation or World Central Kitchen. They provide essential support, from assisting displaced families to ensuring first responders and victims have food and shelter.
~ Rob
PS: In times of uncertainty, finding ways to stay grounded and present can make all the difference. If you’re looking for tools to help you cultivate clarity and resilience, my Embodied Mindfulness Membership is open. I also have space for two more private students.
Opening to Awareness With Yin Yoga: Find Clarity and Calm
Opening to awareness is about letting go. In this Yin Yoga practice, I guide you through a yin yoga practice that will help you tune into the natural awareness that’s always present.
With minimal effort and a focus on being, not doing, this session creates space for clarity and calm.
Listening To Silence: A 30 Minute Yin Yoga Practice
Listening to silence is a powerful way to drop into the present moment. In this Yin Yoga practice, I offer minimal cues to help you truly connect with stillness and your inner experience. This quiet, meditative session is perfect for creating space in your body and mind while tuning into the subtle power of silence.
Take Time to Pause and Breathe: A Yin Yoga Practice
Pause and breathe with me in this Yin Yoga practice. I’ll guide you through gentle poses and mindful breathing to help release tension, balance your nervous system, and reconnect with the present moment. Grab a blanket, a couple of blocks, and join me as we create space for stillness and ease.
The 5 Meditation Myths Holding You Back
Meditation comes with a lot of expectations.
Calm. Stillness. Clarity.
But when you sit down to practice, it can feel like you’re doing it all wrong.
Your mind won’t stop racing. You can’t find the perfect cushion. You don’t feel relaxed at all.
That’s because we’ve all been told countless myths about meditation—many of which are flat-out wrong.
Today, I’d like to share five of the most common meditation myths that keep my students stuck.
By learning to let go of these myths, you’ll reconnect with your practice in a way that feels natural, intuitive, and alive.
1. The Myth of Perfect Conditions
We think that meditation requires the right conditions:
Silence.
A pretty space.
The perfect cushion.
But none of these really matter.
Life is noisy. There’s traffic outside. Your kids might be playing in the next room. Maybe your neighbor is mowing the lawn.
These things aren’t barriers to practice—they are the practice.
I’ve even sat on retreats where the near-perfect conditions were constantly shattered by hammering from construction or the whir of a leaf blower.
My teachers reframed these distractions—not as obstacles, but as prime opportunities to notice how my mind reacts.
Because the real work of meditation isn’t about creating ideal conditions. It’s about being present with whatever’s here.
And this applies far beyond formal meditation. Waiting in line, sitting at a stoplight, or riding the bus are perfect opportunities to practice mindfulness.
Perfect conditions are a myth.
Equanimity—the ability to stay grounded no matter what’s happening around you—is the deeper intention.
2. The Myth of a Quiet Mind
“I can’t meditate because my mind won’t stop racing.”
I hear this all the time. It’s one of the biggest misconceptions about meditation.
But meditation isn’t about silencing your thoughts. It’s about noticing them without getting lost in them.
I still remember my first mini-retreat—a six-hour afternoon workshop. I showed up expecting to achieve the blissful, quiet mind I’d imagined.
Instead, my mind spun in circles, and I left feeling frustrated and defeated.
When I told my teacher, he smiled and said, “Sounds like a fruitful retreat.”
At the time, I didn’t get it. Now I do.
The act of noticing your thoughts is the practice. Especially when they feel overwhelming.
Over time, your attachment to thoughts—and your resistance to them—soften. The mind begins to settle, and the stillness that’s already there starts to shine through.
But the irony is, the only way to get there is by allowing your thoughts to just be.
3. The Myth of Relaxation
Meditation is often sold as a way to relax. But that’s not the whole truth.
Yes, meditation can calm the mind. But its real power lies in helping you meet your experience—whether it’s pleasant or not.
In Buddhist teachings, meditation has two aspects: tranquility (shamatha) and insight (vipassana). Tranquility calms the mind. Insight helps you see reality clearly.
Feeling restless or uncomfortable during meditation isn’t a failure. It’s a sign you’re paying attention.
Meditation reveals the mind’s patterns. Over time, you learn to let those patterns come and go without resistance.
This builds equanimity: deep peace that doesn’t depend on circumstances.
Relaxation is part of the process, but it’s not the goal. The goal is to meet your experience as it is, without resistance.
4. The Myth of Enlightenment
Enlightenment feels mystical. Even magical.
Most people see it as a far-off goal, reserved for the most intense practitioners.
But awakening isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about uncovering the reality of what’s already here.
The stillness, clarity, and freedom you’re seeking aren’t outside of you. They’re your natural state. Meditation helps untangle the patterns that obscure them.
Here’s the paradox: if you’re chasing enlightenment as something “out there,” you’re moving further away from it.
Awakening is about waking up to this moment—not striving for some imagined future state.
It’s a gradual process, built through small moments of mindfulness. But it’s accessible. And it’s already here—if you make the space for it.
5. The Myth of Monks and Masters
Many people assume that deep meditation is only for monks or for people who dedicate their entire lives to practice.
Wrong.
Over my years of teaching, I’ve met countless people who’ve achieved profound insights while living “ordinary” lives. Musicians. Professionals. Artists.
Through mindfulness, they transformed their relationship with their otherwise ordinary lives.
Daily life isn’t an obstacle to practice. It’s the ideal place for practice.
You don’t need to meditate in a cave or escape the world to experience transformation.
You just need to commit to showing up.
Mindfulness isn’t about escaping life. It’s about engaging with it fully and meeting everything that arises with presence and equanimity.
What These Myths Have in Common
All of these myths frame meditation as something special or separate from daily life.
But meditation isn’t about perfection. It’s not about creating an ideal state or achieving some mystical goal.
It’s about meeting life as it is. Right now.
You don’t need ideal conditions. You don’t need to silence your mind. You don’t need to relax, escape, or become someone else.
You just need to begin. Again and again.
If these myths have been holding you back, check out my free course, The Embodied Mindfulness Method. It’s a step-by-step guide to integrating meditation and yin yoga into your daily life.
And when you are ready to fully immerse yourself in transfromation, the Embodied Mindfulness Membership is now open.
And if any of these myths resonate with your experience—or if there’s one I missed—I’d love to hear from you. Reply, share your thoughts, or ask a question.
5 Meditation Myths Debunked: What’s Holding Your Practice Back?
Meditation myths debunked! In this video, I break down five common myths about meditation that hold people back from progress. Learn why meditation doesn’t require perfect silence or stopping your thoughts, and how relaxation isn’t the only goal. Discover how to work with real-life challenges and deepen your practice, no matter your experience level.
Whether you’re new to meditation or a seasoned practitioner, this video will help you clear away misconceptions and reconnect with the true purpose of mindfulness.
Yin Yoga for Focused Awareness: Build Concentration Through Mindful Practice
Yin Yoga for Focused Awareness helps you build concentration and anchor attention. This session explores grounding, mindful breathing, and gentle poses to cultivate present-moment focus. Discover how your body and breath can deepen mindfulness and strengthen your ability to stay present.
Why Most People Quit Meditation (And How to Keep Going)
Have you ever sat down to meditate and felt like you were doing it all wrong?
Frustration builds. Your mind won’t stop racing. You start to wonder if you’re wasting your time.
You’re not alone.
I’ve been practicing meditation for nearly 20 years, and I’ve spent 15 of those teaching it to other people.
Over and over, I see the same struggles—frustration, self-doubt, discomfort — come up.
These are the moments when most people give up.
Not because they’re failing, but because they don’t realize that these challenges are the practice.
So today, I’d like to discuss why most people quit meditation and give you some practical tips on how to stick with it when it gets tough.
Unrealistic Expectations
Meditation has a marketing problem.
Movies and pop culture have shown us endless images of cool Zen monks sitting serenely on remote mountaintops.
So when we come to our practice, we feel that by learning a few techniques, we too will be our pathway to instant Zen.
But unfortunately, meditation just doesn’t work like that.
Those calm, peaceful states will come. But they have to be earned through the process of showing up, again and again, especially when it’s hard.
So when you start meditating, expect some chaos. Your mind will be noisy. Your body might resist. But that’s normal.
Over time, as you stay with it, clarity and calm will start to emerge.
Self-Doubt
When you’re sitting there with your mind wandering all over the place, it’s easy to feel like you’re doing it wrong.
You might even think, “Maybe meditation just isn’t for me.”
This kind of doubt is something I hear from students all the time.
But please know that it’s not a sign that you’re failing. It’s a natural part of the process.
Meditation isn’t about having perfect focus or a completely quiet mind. The core of the practice is in showing up, noticing what’s happening, and learning to let go.
Sitting with your doubt instead of running from it builds resilience.
That resilience is the foundation of the transformation you’re looking for.
Physical Discomfort
Let’s be honest. For most of us, sitting still is anything but easy.
If you’re like most people, your body is tight and your posture habits probably aren’t doing you any favors either.
So when you sit down to meditate, discomfort will show up. Usually very quickly.
But instead of seeing this as a problem, I encourage you to work with it as a part of the process.
Discomfort invites you to pay more attention. Can you notice how it feels, how it changes, and what happens when you finally stop resisting it? Over time, discomfort can become one of the most powerful parts of your practice.
That said, preparation helps immensely, and Yin Yoga can be a game-changer for meditation practice.
By releasing deep physical tension and learning how to let go in your body, sitting still becomes far less of a challenge.
If you’re curious, I’ve got dozens of free Yin Yoga videos on my YouTube Channel to help you get started. I also go deep into this subject in my free course: The Embodied Mindfulness Method.
Impatience
Modern life has given us the attention spans of goldfish. (With no offense meant to our aquatic friends.)
In almost everything in life, we think that results should come quickly and that effort should be minimal.
Meditation directly contradicts this pattern. There are no real hacks or shortcuts. It has to be a long-term commitment.
Each session, even the tough ones, is slowly transforming you.
Think of it like learning an instrument. You wouldn’t expect to pick up a bass and play like Flea on day one, or even month one.
Meditation, like all practices, works the same way.
With each session, you are building your skills. Over time, the compound interest will accumulate, and it won’t feel like such a challenge anymore.
Practical Tips to Keep Going
So now that we’ve unpacked some of the why, here are a few strategies that can help you to stick with your meditation practice over the long term:
Start Small: Even a minute counts. It’s better to do a little every day than to aim for long sessions and burn out. As you learn to make the commitment, it will be easier to naturally find time for longer sessions.
Tie It to a Routine: Anchor your meditation to something you already do daily without thinking of it. Think of things like drinking your morning coffee or brushing your teeth. What routine can you add your meditation practice into?
Use Guided Meditations: Guided meditations can be a helpful tool, especially when you’re feeling stuck. But try to mix them with self-guided practice to build independence.
Relax the Body First: Practices like Yin Yoga or even a short walk can help prepare your body and mind for stillness. Please see my YouTube channel if you need a place to start.
Why It Matters
Meditation isn’t about escaping your life. It’s about learning how to show up fully for it.
It’s about reconnecting with what matters most. Not by changing your circumstances but by changing how you relate to them.
Over time, your practice will teach you how to let go of stress, cultivate clarity, and meet challenges steadily.
Each of these small, daily efforts adds up. Each session is a step toward finding balance, and becoming the person who faces life with resilience and presence.
What have been the biggest challenges—or breakthroughs—in your meditation practice?
Leave a comment below. I’d love to hear your story.
If you’re ready to take your practice deeper, check out my free course, The Embodied Mindfulness Method. It combines meditation and Yin Yoga to help you stay consistent and unlock these benefits.
For even more support, my Embodied Mindfulness Membership offers weekly live sessions, a full library of recorded practices, and a community of like-minded practitioners. It’s a space to deepen your practice and stay inspired.
Here's Why Most People Quit Meditation (And How to Keep Going)
Why most people quit meditation (and how to keep going) often comes down to frustration, self-doubt, or physical discomfort. In this video, I explain why most people quit meditation and share actionable tips to help you keep going when it feels challenging. We’ll tackle the unrealistic expectations, self-doubt, and discomfort that cause so many people to quit. By sticking with meditation, you’ll build a habit that brings clarity, calm, and growth.
Release Tension with Yin Yoga | Quiet the Mind, Free the Body
Release tension with Yin Yoga and stop letting stress take over your body and mind.
Tension in your body isn’t random, it’s a signal from your mind.
This practice uses Yin Yoga to help you let go of that tension, physically and mentally, so you can move and think more clearly.
Grab two blocks and a blanket for this session.
Calm in the Chaos: Yin Yoga for Mental Stillness | Find Peace Through Your Body
Life won’t stop just because you’re overwhelmed. Calm in the Chaos: Yin Yoga for Mental Stillness is about learning to stay grounded when everything feels like too much. Through Yin Yoga, we’ll anchor in the body, quiet the mental noise, and find a stillness that doesn’t depend on things going perfectly.
The World Will Never Slow Down—But You Always Can
If you’re a human alive on this planet right now, you’ve likely noticed the immense sense of turbulence in the air.
The world feels more divided than ever. Fingers are being pointed in all directions. Everyone claims to have answers, but clarity remains elusive.
It’s easy to feel trapped in a vortex with no way out.
But here’s a truth you can always count on:
While the world will never slow down for us, we always have the power to slow down for ourselves.
Staying plugged in is seductive.
It feels comforting, necessary even.
We want to read the latest headline, watch the cute cat video, laugh at the newest meme.
But ultimately, it's all just adding fuel to the fire.
Instead, in the face of uncertainty, the answer is to take back control of what you can.
Unplugging from the noise isn't just rebellious; it's essential.
It can give you the clarity you've been searching for.
Here is my invitation for you.
This weekend:
Unplug: Put down your phone. Turn off the news. Give it a break.
Connect: Get back in your body. Go for a long walk. Try a Yin Yoga session—there are dozens on my YouTube page. Do something physical.
Be Still: Sit in meditation for at least 5 minutes. Try for even longer if you can.
Reflect: Observe any changes in your mood or clarity. Consider jotting down your thoughts in a journal.
While we can't control the world, we can always control our response to it.
By taking charge of your environment and behaviors, you can craft the life of clarity that you’re seeking.
It doesn't take much; just honest intention and a little time.
I’d love to hear how this experience goes for you. Please coment and share your thoughts!
For those ready to dive deeper, I'd like to invite you to join me for my new Embodied Mindfulness Membership.
It will give you the tools and the guidance you need to thrive in this turbulent time.
What's Inside:
Live Yin Yoga Sessions Twice a Week; all added to an ever-growing practice library.
Guided Meditations and Talks.
Supportive Community.
Optional 1-1 Guidance.
The program begins on December 1st. Sign up before January 1st to receive 50% off your first month.
Click here to schedule a meeting to see if the program is a good fit.
Hi, I'm Rob! I teach Yoga and Meditation in West LA and Online.
You can learn a bit more about me here, in my bio.
Also, check out my public class schedule and upcoming workshops to practice with me in person, or online!